What is a healthy sexuality?
The healthy sexuality is a human dimension that develops from the moment of conception and evolves manifesting itself differently depending on the evolution and maturation time of the person. It includes a whole universe of experiences, emotions and connections. characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
A vigorous and active sexuality is an expression of good health.
Knowledge about sexuality, attitudes and expression of it are influenced by environmental and cultural factors, so they vary from one culture to another and have been changing over time.
The exercise of sexuality must be informed, responsible, is an expression of the autonomy of each person and requires it to take place in equity, without violence, without impositions or coercion. characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
A healthy sexuality requires that we know ourselves, that we accept ourselves and that we allow ourselves to express ourselves with freedom and respect for ourselves and others.
How can we help
There are many reasons why a person can consult for questions related to sexuality without being called “sexual problems”. Some of them are: characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
- Doubts or ignorance about one’s own sexuality and that of others , including what is a healthy sexuality.
- Want advice for making decisions about the exercise of sexuality .
- Confusion about feelings of love or sexual attraction.
- Doubts about the orientation of sexual desire
- Concerns about aspects of sexuality or the expression of it that are unconventional. Concerns about sexually transmitted diseases. characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
- Fear of being judged or misunderstood by family, friends, colleagues, or friends.
- Concerns about low libido or low or high performance .
- Need for how to talk to children about sexuality, counseling on sexuality education.
On occasions, people may consider that they have problems or symptoms that are problematic and that manifest themselves in the field of sexuality and their sexual relationships and that, having ruled out medical causes, they may have a psychological and / or emotional origin. .
Most common sexual problems
A sexuality that does not work well, can induce suffering in people and in their relationships, some of the common problems for which people may wish to consult with a therapist are:
- Sexual anxiety or apprehension about sexuality and sexual relationships.
- Lack of sexual desire.
- Difficulty or inability to feel and / or have orgasms.
- Discomfort or difficulties in sexual intercourse.
- Sexual violence
- Sex addiction.
- Compatibility with my sexual partner.
A safe and private place where you can talk characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
Sometimes we overlook our sexuality, either because we are embarrassed to talk about it or because we do not consider it an integral part of who we are.
Although society has evolved, people’s sexual education has improved, there is still a lot of shame associated with talking about sexuality. We can feel uncomfortable, even in dialogues with ourselves, when we approach our sexuality, how we express it and what our sexual relationships are like. For this reason, it is important to find a safe place where we know that this matter will be treated with respect, acceptance, without value judgments and confidentiality.
Whatever your motivation, it is important to find a safe place where you can feel free to discuss these issues and a therapist you can trust. characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
Characteristics of the human sexual relationship characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
Once the zoological sexual characteristics of man have been briefly analyzed, we can proceed to describe the characteristics of the sexual relationship. However, it is necessary to define the difference between sexual intercourse and intercourse.
Sexual relationship is the set of elements that have some importance in the sexual understanding of the human couple, or in the relationship process between the two, whether permanent or temporary.
Intercourse or vaginal intercourse is the introduction of the penis into the vagina. It can also be an anal intercourse or an oral intercourse, when the introduction of the penis is in the rectum through the anus or in the mouth respectively. It is only one part of the coital sexual response and this is one phase of the intercourse process. On many occasions it can be absent, or even partially fulfilled, without affecting the entire human relationship in the field of sexuality. The human sexual relationship is built on the basis of the development of sexuality as a component of the personality with its characteristics of historicity, voluptuousness, transcendence, language and paradoxical response.
The sexual relationship can be analyzed depending on the stages of development of the human being. This is how there are elements of sexuality in the child, in preschool, in adolescence, in adulthood, in senescence. In each of these stages of human development there are elements of sexuality, of sexual relationship. However, copulation or intercourse is not present in all of them. characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
In order to schematize didactically, we will divide human sexual behavior, from a zoological-anthropological point of view, into four major stages:
a) Formation of the couple;
b) Pre-copulative phase;
c) Copulative phase, and
d) Post-copulative phase.
This approach has been taken from the anthropologist and zoologist Desmond Morris, who describes it in his book “The Naked Monkey.” characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
In each of these phases there are factors that affect the characteristics and evolution of behavior. They are biological, psychological, social and environmental factors. These factors contribute to the adequacy or balance of each of these phases.
Pair formation phase
In most animal species, this phase is described as the “courtship” phase. It can be longer or shorter, spanning days, weeks, and even months. It has certain connotations, which are usually described as fear, aggression, such as sexual attraction, nervousness or hesitation. However, it is characterized by an act that is indifferent to the environment.
This phase generally begins with a visual and vocal display: the gaze, the whisper. It continues with a stage of bodily contacts: hands, arms, mouth to face, mouth to mouth, statically or during the couple’s locomotion. Children’s demonstrations reappear. They are developed and run in private and in public. That is, the male or female zoo (human) develops this stage both in private and in public, and in an upright position.
This pre-copulative phase is characterized by the search for solitude, and by the sitting position or the horizontal position for its execution. characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
Language takes on other characteristics; visual and sound signals are replaced by tactile signals, which extend to the entire body. These signs compromise the use of the hands, the lips, the tongue, to move to the stripping of clothing and increased contacts to the whole body, and particularly genitalia. Pre-coital games or caresses of the couple are developed reciprocally, mainly in the genital area, reaching very intense contacts that result in pinching, biting and the strong intertwining of the extremities of the male and the female. In this pre-copulative phase you can reach orgasm, both in the male and in the female.
Copulative phase characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
This phase of sexual intercourse begins with the insertion of the penis into the vagina, anus or mouth and is of a shorter period than the pre-copulative phase. A first element to study in this phase refers to the position taken by the couple, which can be very varied. There are texts that describe them in detail as the classical Hindu text Kama-sutra.
The frontal form of mating has been described as typical. One wonders why in the human species there are some differences with other lower primates such as the monkey, in that the mating is done from behind. That is, the female from the back and the male in that position introducing the penis into the vagina.
In effect, copulation in the higher primate is a face-to-face copulation, it is a personalized sex or personalized intercourse. From a biological point of view, the distribution of the erogenous zones is fundamentally in the frontal part of the human being; Physiologically, it is the position that allows the best use of the genitals, both due to the angle of the vagina and the angle of erection of the penis. In general, the other positions as producers of a greater orgasm have been discarded (studies by Master and Johnson).
Rather, they are interpreted as variations on routine, and as a sense of introducing complexity. In Kinsey’s sociological studies with surveys on sexual behavior, it was observed that 90% of couples use the frontal position, and only a low percentage use another type of position. This has varied over the years. The Chilean sexual behavior survey shows changes with the younger age of the respondents. characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
Next, the physiological changes that occur during the pre-copulative phase and the copulative phase of the human are analyzed, described by Master and Johnson (5,6,7,8,9,10)
Four stages have been described based on the physiological changes of the effectors.
It begins with somatic or psychogenic stimulation. Its duration depends on the quality and intensity of the stimulus. This stage is located in the pre-copulative phase of sexual intercourse.
Plateau Phase characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
It is more arousal, which again depends on the intensity of the stimulus, and the characteristics of each of the members of the couple. Quickly, depending on these factors, you can move on to the Orgasm Phase, or even the next Resolution Phase. This stage is also located in the last pre-copulative phase or in the copulative phase.
Orgasmic Phase characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
It is the maximum sexual response of copulation, and its period is quite constant in men. This does not happen in women. The answer in the latter is slightly later. On the other hand, the ability to orgasm is earlier in men than in women. Thus, the orgasmic capacity of a 15-year-old man could be comparable to the orgasmic capacity of a 29-year-old woman.
The man also has a lower response to repeated orgasm, if we compare it with the woman. In a woman, more than one orgasm can occur in the same intercourse, an infrequent fact in men. By way of description, according to the works of Master and Johnson, in some of the couples studied, 11 orgasms were determined in some women. characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
Resolution Phase characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
It is a state of involution, characterized by lack of excitability. The man has a refractory period that does not allow a new response to a sexual stimulus, even if it is very intense. The female response, on the other hand, has a greater sensitivity in the resolution period that allows her to have repeated orgasm, in the face of an intense stimulus. characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship
Immediate post-copulative phase
In the post-copulative phase of the human being, the sense of reciprocal belonging of the couple appears, as consequences of that desire “to be penetrated”, or to “penetrate”, and before the fulfillment of that desire with penetration. This concept Penetration, more than a biological concept, is of a psychological nature, of absolute belonging, it could be described as “the sense of what is mine.”
Another interesting fact in the post-copular state of the human couple is the development of security or insecurity of the couple. This depends on the result of the total sexual intercourse, rather than on the intercourse itself. Finally, in our Latin American society this post-copular state contributes as a factor of dominance or dependence. It is the use of copulation as dominance or dependence on the human partner.
The following links illustrate the female and male coital sexual response in these 4 phases, as described and investigated by Master and Johnson. characteristics of a sexually healthy relationship